Got a dead grandparent? Call the Vultures! |
There was once a family of vultures: a mom, a dad, and a child. Every day, the parents would go out to the desert, find something dead, and bring it back to their nest, and they would all eat happily together.
The dad has always loved the taste of flesh and the mom liked collecting things from her dead mother as she was in charge of her estate.
But their son was a picky eater and new to this Vulture family business.
One day, the child said to his parents, "I don't want to eat meat anymore. My friend the rabbit gave me some fruit, and it was the best thing ever! I want to start eating plants."
The father was outraged. "No son of mine will eat plants!" But the mother followed him as he stormed away.
"Dear, we have a good son. He's just a little confused. We should let him have some plant food if he really wants it, it's just a phase."
"Well, alright," said the father. "I'll bring some meat, you go out and get some--eeuugh!--vegetables, or something."
The mother flew over the nearby town for a few hours. She found a carrot first, but it slipped through her fingers. It was too thin. Same with cucumbers and bean sprouts. The tofu didn't work at all. She finally managed to hold onto a can of peas.
The two came back home. The child turned his nose up at the roadkill armadillo his father brought but was overjoyed when his mother dropped the can of peas on a rock, breaking it open.
"Thank you, mom!" But as he started for the food, his dad blocked his way.
"I don't understand you, kid, and I think you're making a mistake. Vultures need protein. Before eating that rabbit food, have some armadillo. Do it for your old man."
"But dad, I don't want to eat dead animals!"
"Carrion, my wayward son. There'll be peas when you are done."
Story and Image: ©Æ Firestone/Storyteller
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