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| Soft n' Fluffy |
So there was this married couple and the husband was a drunk. He would constantly drink and end up get abusive towards his wife.
So one day the wife gets fed up and decides she is going to go to the pet store and get something that will help defend herself. When she gets to the store an employee asks her what she is looking for.
The wife says "My husband is a drunk and every night when he comes home he is abusive toward me. I'm looking for something that can help protect me. I don't care how much it is I just need something."
The employee takes her over to the dogs and shows her a German Shepard, a Rottweiler, and a Pitbull.
The wife says "No I'm not looking for a dog it won't do anything, dogs are man's best friend. There has to be something else here that can defend me."
The employee tells her "Well I may have something in the back that can help but it is very expensive I'm not sure you can afford it."
The wife tells him "I already told you that I don't care how much it costs. I am sick of my husband."
So the employee takes her into the back of the store and brings her over to a small cage in the corner. Inside the cage is a tiny pure white fluffy fur ball. The man explains that it is called a Muff Puff and that it will be more than capable of helping her with the problem she is having with her husband.
The wife looks at him and laughs as she says "There is no way that little thing could do anything to anyone. Prove to me it is actually going to do anything."
The employee asks for her sweater and she gives it to him. The employee takes the sweater and makes it into a ball and places it inside the cage.
The employee says to the Muff Puff "Muff Puff Sweater." All of a sudden the little fur ball goes crazy and attacks the sweater. After only a few seconds the swear is gone and all that is left is a small pile of torn up cloth.
The employee asks if she's interested and she replies "That proves nothing, it was just a sweater. If I'm going to buy something to protect myself it needs to do more than that." The employee understands and agrees to give her one more example. He goes and grabs a 2x4 and places it inside the cage.
The employee then backs away and says "Muff Puff 2x4" and once again the Muff Puff attacks the 2x4 and after a few seconds there is nothing left but a pile of sawdust. After seeing this the wife is impressed and agrees that she will take it.
So the wife is sitting at home reading a book later that day with her brand new pet sitting on the coffee table next to her. The husband comes home from the bar and is once again getting ready to take his built up anger out on his wife.
The husbands yells "I have had it with your shit." and begins to approach her.
The wife calmly puts down the book and looks at him saying. "I don't think so. You see I got a new pet today and he is going to protect me and I won't need to deal with you."
The husband looks at the Muff Puff and laughs saying "You think that little thing is gonna protect you from me? That thing is the size of a softball."
The wife smiles and replies "That is exactly what my Muff Puff is going to do."
The husband laughing even harder says "Yeah right, Muff Puff my ass." Trust me that Muff Puff tore that ass up
Image: Alina Cardiae
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